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wellness

Why you shouldn’t let go of your negative emotions

I always had a resistance to the term of high vibrations.

Just keep your vibration high, and all will be fine.

Right?

Wrong.

But what keeping your vibration high really means? From what I noticed in all these discussions about vibrational energy it seems that through keeping the vibration high you’d likely feel more peaceful, lighter and at ease with life, shifting negative emotions and energy into positive ones.

At a first read you’d say but what is wrong about wanting to feel light, positive and peaceful all the time?

There is nothing wrong per se, but it is just not possible and not even desirable.

Let’s look into human emotions a little.

Human emotions are of all sorts.

Pleasant and uplifting emotions for the body and mind: such as pure joy, intense happiness, excitement.

Others bring us a sense of peace and contentment such as feeling calm, relaxed, in the moment.

On the opposite, we have unpleasant emotions: those we don’t like, we don’t want or we want to change: those emotions are anger, fear, guilt, shame, pain, sadness.

Most of the time the term of high vibrations will never include these emotions and all the advice you find out there about rising your vibration will teach you how to get rid or transform those ”negative” emotions into positive ones.

First thing first:

There is no such thing as positive = desirable emotions and negative = undesirable emotions.

Our emotions are our body’s signals that something is ultimately right or wrong for us. Our emotions are our biggest teachers and friends, even if they are uncomfortable or unpleasant. Our body communicates to us through our emotions. We receive the most important messages through the emotions we experience.

Let me tell you a personal story.

For a big part of my life, I thought that my emotions are wrong.

That listening to my emotions was something that I should never do, because they are not true.

So I blocked my emotions completely.

I accepted abusive behaviour thinking it was love. I never got angry, never had an argument.

I was a kind, compassionate, understanding person. Always giving people credit for what they were.

But what I did was to accept behaviours that were ultimately wrong: I accepted emotional abuse, control, manipulation, rudeness. Because I thought I am the one who needs to be kind.

I now know that this comes from the way I was raised to not believe in my experiences and my own senses, being always invalidated. ( if you grew up in a toxic household, you probably know what I mean – perhaps I should develop these ideas more at the right time).

Meditation – a gateway to your emotions

The moment I started to re-connect with my emotions was the time when I started to meditate regularly.

It was the first time when I actually started to listen. And to open my eyes.

I started to see that were many things in my life that were wrong. I was able to accept that I wasn’t happy in my marriage and that I didn’t live the life I wanted to live.

I was able to see my own sadness, hopelessness, tiredness and even anger.

Were these emotions wrong? I bet you they weren’t! They were unpleasant, yes! But not wrong.

What if I would’ve observed them, breathed deeply and ignored them trying to keep my vibration high? What if I was never acting upon them?

I would’ve probably still be married to a guy who was pretending that from too much love he was following me at work, at the gym, at my catch-up with friends. A guy who was spending mindlessly the money I earned with great effort because we were using joint accounts and who has never respected the budget plans I was trying to help with to manage our crazy debts. But if I would’ve ignored my anger, my hopelessness and despair, hiding under a sweet umbrella of listening to zen music and burning sage, I wouldn’t ever be able to divorce this guy.

This is just an example how uncomfortable, and so-called negative emotions are actually healthy emotions that can show us the truth and the way to live a life that is authentic. I am sure you have your own examples. The moment I got in touch with my emotions was an awakening call, for me to start living my way with my eyes largely open. And so I did.

So let’s look closer into some of the high vibrations ideas that I feel are unhealthy and what to do instead to manage and get advantage of your emotions in a healthy way:

Uncofortable feelings, negative emotions what to really do about them

Uncomfortable feelings are good – they show you something.

They show you are unhappy in an area of your life.

Don’t get rid of them!

Look at your life and make the changes you need. By doing that, you’ll have a real reason to say that you…

  • transformed unhappiness into happiness,
  • boredom into excitement
  • and anger into peace.

I do believe relaxation techniques are very helpful to help you feel better in the moment, to transform the temporary discomfort into something more bearable so you can live your life and cope with your situation.

But don’t rely exclusively on relaxation techniques and ignore the bad and the ugly that happens. This is another way of suppressing your emotions and you don’t want that!

Until next time,

Many blessings

Amelia