I always had a bit of resistance on the term of high vibrations, raising your vibration and all the advice that surrounds this state of being. There is no day on social media without advice on how to keep your vibration high. You can find it everywhere in the spiritual community and I am sure you already came across it.
But what keeping your vibration high really means?
From what I noticed in all these discussions about vibrational energy it seems that through keeping the vibration high you’d likely feel more peaceful, lighter, and at ease with life, shifting negative emotions and energies into positive ones. You’d be a positive person, calm, connected with the loving energy of the Divine flowing through you and you’ll only spread love, light and …of course, high vibrations.
At a first read you’d say but what is wrong about wanting to feel light, positive and peaceful all the time?
My honest thought on this is that there is nothing wrong per se, but it is just not possible and not even desirable. Let’s look into human emotions a little.
Human emotions are of all kinds, some feel pleasant and uplifting for the body and mind: such as pure joy, intense happiness, excitement.
Others simply bring us a sense of peace and contentment such as feeling calm, relaxed, in the moment.
And finally, we experience those at the unpleasant spectrum, those emotions that we most of the time we don’t like, we don’t want or we want to change: those emotions are anger, fear, guilt, shame, pain, sadness.
Most of the time the term of high vibrations will never include these emotions and all the advice you find out there about rising your vibration will teach you how to get rid or transform those ”negative” emotions into positive ones.
First thing first: there is no such thing as positive = desirable emotions and negative = undesirable emotions.
Our emotions are our body’s signals that something is ultimately right or wrong for us. Our emotions are our biggest teachers and friends, even if they are uncomfortable or unpleasant. Our body communicates to us through our emotions. We receive the most important messages through the emotions we experience.
This happened to me when I looked at my emotions
Let me tell you a personal story. For a big part of my life I thought that my emotions are wrong. That listening to my emotions was something that I should never do, because they are not true. So I blocked my emotions completely. I accepted abusive behaviour thinking it was love, I was never getting angry, I would never ever have an argument with anyone, and I was the one who was understanding and kind to others, giving them credit for what they were, without seeing behaviours that were ultimately wrong. I now know that this comes from the way I was raised, to not believe in my experiences and my own senses, being always invalidated. ( if you grew up in a toxic household, you probably know what I mean – perhaps I should develop these ideas more at the right time).
Meditation awakened me
The moment I started to re-connect with my emotions was the time when I started to meditate regularly. It was the first time when I actually started to listen. And not only to listen, but to open my eyes.
I started to see that were many things in my life that were wrong, I was able to see myself that I was not happy in my marriage and that I didn’t live the life I wanted to live. I was able to see sadness, hopelessness, tiredness, and even anger.
Were these emotions wrong? I bet you not! They were unpleasant, yes! But not wrong. They were true, real, authentic. What if I would’ve observed them, breathed deeply, let them go, and eventually ignored them trying to keep my vibration high? What if I was never acting upon them?
I would’ve probably still be married to a guy who was pretending that from too much love he was following me at work, at the gym, at my catch-up with friends. A guy who was spending mindlessly the money I earned with great effort because we were using joint accounts and who has never respected the budget plans I was trying to help with to manage our crazy debts.
But if I would’ve ignored my anger, my hopelessness and despair, hiding under a sweet umbrella of listening to zen music and burning sage, I would’ve never been able to divorce this guy.
This is just an example how uncomfortable, and so-called negative emotions are actually healthy emotions that can show us the truth and the way to live a life that is authentic. I am sure you have your own examples. The moment I got in touch with my emotions was an awakening call, for me to start living my way with my eyes largely open. And so I did.
So let’s look closer into some of the high vibrations ideas that I feel are unhealthy and what to do instead to manage and get the advantage of your emotions in a healthy way:
Uncomfortable feelings, negative emotions what to really do about them
Uncomfortable feelings are good – they show you something. They show you are unhappy in an area of your life. What you need to do is not to get rid of them, but to look at your life and make the changes you need. Only after that, you’ll have a real reason to say that you transformed unhappiness into happiness, boredom into excitement and anger into peace. Not through some relaxation techniques or overexercising that only kept you distracted from the real problem!
Don’t get me wrong, the relaxation techniques are very helpful to feel better in the moment, to transform the temporary discomfort into something more bearable so you can cope with your situation until something changes, or to keep you safe from doing crazy things or making impulsive decisions.
But if all you do is to only use relaxation techniques and ignore the bad and the ugly that happens, refusing to look at those aspects in your life that do not work, this won’t get you anywhere long term. It is still another way of suppressing your emotions and ignoring your body’s messages.
I’m going to develop these ideas with some suggestions on how to approach positivity in a healthy way into a series of articles here on my blog and on my youtube channel.
Until next time, many blessings,